Northern Lights - Book Review

Northern Lights (aka The Golden Compass) (His Dark Materials #1) by Philip Pullman

What is it about:
In a landmark epic of fantasy and storytelling, Philip Pullman invites readers into a world as convincing and thoroughly realized as Narnia, Earthsea, or Redwall. Here lives an orphaned ward named Lyra Belacqua, whose carefree life among the scholars at Oxford's Jordan College is shattered by the arrival of two powerful visitors. First, her fearsome uncle, Lord Asriel, appears with evidence of mystery and danger in the far North, including photographs of a mysterious celestial phenomenon called Dust and the dim outline of a city suspended in the Aurora Borealis that he suspects is part of an alternate universe. He leaves Lyra in the care of Mrs. Coulter, an enigmatic scholar and explorer who offers to give Lyra the attention her uncle has long refused her. In this multilayered narrative, however, nothing is as it seems. Lyra sets out for the top of the world in search of her kidnapped playmate, Roger, bearing a rare truth-telling instrument, the compass of the title. All around her children are disappearing, victims of so-called "Gobblers", and being used as subjects in terrible experiments that separate humans from their daemons, creatures that reflect each person's inner being. And somehow, both Lord Asriel and Mrs. Coulter are involved.

What did I think of it:
A really great read! This book is the first in a trilogy, but can easily be read as a stand alone if you don't mind an open ending. Lyra is a fun and strong heroine who I loved right from the start of the story. The worldbuilding in this book is excellent and Pullman manages to create a cast of unforgettable characters to fill this world. My favourite character is Iorek Byrnison the armoured bear. Yes: this book has talking animals! The story is thought provoking, suspenseful, filled with action and emotion and totally cool. It is made into a movie, but the movie doesn't even come close in capturing the heart of this book.

Why should you read it:
It's got armoured bears!

The Iron Witch - Book Review

The Iron Witch (The Iron Witch #1) by Karen Mahoney

What is it about:
Freak. That's what her classmates call seventeen-year-old Donna Underwood. When she was seven, a horrific fey attack killed her father and drove her mother mad. Donna's own nearly fatal injuries from the assault were fixed by magic—the iron tattoos branding her hands and arms. The child of alchemists, Donna feels cursed by the magical heritage that destroyed her parents and any chance she had for a normal life. The only thing that keeps her sane and grounded is her relationship with her best friend, Navin Sharma.
When the darkest outcasts of Faerie—the vicious wood elves—abduct Navin, Donna finally has to accept her role in the centuries old war between the humans and the fey. Assisted by Xan, a gorgeous half-fey dropout with secrets of his own, Donna races to save her friend—even if it means betraying everything her parents and the alchemist community fought to the death to protect.

What did I think of it:
One of the better YA books I've come across lately. Well written, interesting setting and characters and teen angst kept to a minimum. The mix of alchemy and faeries isn't something I'd expected to go together, but Mahoney makes it work perfectly. The story is clearly a set up for the rest of the series and reads more like an introduction than a stand alone novel, but it's suspenseful and intriguing enough that I don't mind. Instead it makes me curious and eager for the next book.

Why should you read it:
It's a very original, well written YA read.

River Marked - Early Book Review *

River Marked (Mercedes Thompson #6) by Patricia Briggs

What is it about:
Car mechanic Mercy Thompson has always known there was something different about her, and not just the way she can make a VW engine sit up and beg. Mercy is a shapeshifter, a talent she inherited from her long-gone father. She’s never known any others of her kind. Until now.

An evil is stirring in the depths of the Columbia River—one that her father’s people may know something about. And to have any hope of surviving, Mercy and her mate, the Alpha werewolf Adam, will need their help…

What did I think of it:
I have been hoping for a story like this since reading the first Mercy Thompson book and learning she's a shapeshifter of Native American origin. And it's a great story! Thrilling, suspenseful and filled with emotion. Mercy's background and the story of her people is even more intriguing than I'd imagined and blends in perfectly with the already existing setting. Add a scary and disturbing action storyline to all this and Briggs delivers yet another fabulous book. I'm already looking forward to the next one!

Why should you read it:
It's the best werewolf/shapeshifter series there is!

*River Marked will officially be released on March 1st 2011

The Iron Hunt - Book Review

The Iron Hunt (Hunter Kiss #1) by Marjorie M. Liu

What is it about:
By day, her tattoos are her armor. By night, they unwind from her body to take on forms of their own. Demons of the flesh, turned into flesh. This is the only family demon hunter Maxine Kiss has ever known. The only way to live-and the very way she'll die. For one day, her demons will abandon her for her daughter to assure their own survival-leaving Maxine helpless against her enemies.

But such is the way of Earth's last protector-the only one standing between humanity and the demons breaking out from behind the prison veils. It is a life lacking in love, reveling in death, until one moment-and one man-changes everything . . .

What did I think of it:
I absolutely love this book.
The writing is excellent, the world building even more so and the characters are cooler than cool. Maxine is a great heroine (a perfect mix of strong, independant and vulnerable) and her demon pals are creepy, cute, weird and cool all in one. The story is fast paced, but with enough room to get to know Maxine and see her grow throughout the book. Although it's the first book in this series I can advice everyone to read the short story 'Hunter Kiss' which can be found in the anthology Wild Thing as that story is set before the start of this book (and because it's an awesome story). Which leaves me to add that I look forward to reading book two in this series as Maxine totally kicks ass.

Why should you read it:
It's a cool, kick ass Urban Fantasy read.

Teaser Tuesdays - River Marked

Teaser Tuesdays is a weekly bookish meme, hosted by MizB of Should Be Reading. Anyone can play along! Just do the following:

- Grab your current read
- Open to a random page
- Share two (2) “teaser” sentences from somewhere on that page
BE CAREFUL NOT TO INCLUDE SPOILERS! (make sure that what you share doesn’t give too much away! You don’t want to ruin the book for others!)
- Share the title & author, too, so that other TT participants can add the book to their TBR Lists if they like your teasers!

Kyle grimaced.
"Don't start the conversation if you don't want an honest answer," I told him, hopping out of the chair and perusing one of the bookcases stuffed with Blu-rays, DVDs, and VHS tapes.
(page 24, River Marked by Patricia Briggs)

Blood of the Rose - A Book Review by Voodoo Bride

Blood of the Rose (Tudor Vampire Chronicles #2) by Kate Pearce

What is it about:
When vampire slayer Rosalind Llewellyn had to join forces with her enemy Christopher Ellis to defeat a rogue vampire threatening Henry VIII, their alliance led to a surprising passion. Reunited after a year's separation, they now face a new threat that could destroy their last chance at happiness.

What did Voodoo Bride think of it:
My main concern about the first book in this series was that the romance was very angsty and that the heroine and hero both acted very stubborn. Nothing much has changed when it comes to that in book two I'm afraid. Rosalind and Christopher kept me frustrated about their romance throughout Blood of the Rose as well. There were some less angsty romantic scenes, but far too few in my opinion.

The story and setting on the other hand are really cool and had me totally engrossed until the storyline I was anticipating to be continued in future books was suddenly killed off! I can understand why Pearce made this choice, but I was not happy!

Chances of me continuing this series:
The setting, writing and the characters are all very good and apart from the things I mentioned here I did enjoy the book, so I might give the next book (which starts a new story with different lead characters) a chance to see if this time I will enjoy both the action and the romance.

Why should you read it:
Tudors and Vampires!

Rogue Oracle - Book Review

Rogue Oracle (Oracle #2) by Alayna Williams

What is it about:
Tara Sheridan is the best criminal profiler around—and the most unconventional. Trained as a forensic psychologist, Tara also specializes in Tarot card reading. But she doesn’t need her divination skills to realize that the new assignment from her friend and sometime lover, Agent Harry Li, is a dangerous proposition in every way.

Former Cold War operatives, all linked to a top-secret operation tracking the disposal of nuclear weapons in Russia, are disappearing. There are no bodies, and no clues to their whereabouts. Harry suspects a conspiracy to sell arms to the highest bidder. The cards—and Tara’s increasingly ominous dreams—suggest something darker. Even as Tara sorts through her feelings for Harry and her fractured relationship with the mysterious order known as Delphi’s Daughters, a killer is growing more ruthless by the day. And a nightmare that began decades ago in Chernobyl will reach a terrifying endgame that not even Tara could have foreseen. . . .

What did I think of it:
I absolutely love Dark Oracle, the first book in this series, so I was more than eager to read Rogue Oracle. And let me say:

WOW!!

Rogue Oracle is dark, gritty, disturbing, intense and utterly awesome!

Tara and Harry both have some serious fights on their hands in this book and I must confess they had me worried about their safety and happiness more than once. Even though the overall tone of the story is grim it never crosses the line that makes a story too angsty and desperate for me, instead it drew me in just as tightly as the first book did, cheering on Tara and Harry and cursing those who make their lives difficult. Rogue Oracle is a more than worthy sequel to Dark Oracle and I can only hope there will be more books in this series as I am now officially in love with Tara.

Why should you read it:
It's a totally awesome, intense Urban Fantasy read.

Grave Surprise - Book Review

Grave Surprise (Harper Connelly #2) by Charlaine Harris

What is it about:
While in Memphis, psychic Harper Connelly senses-and finds-two bodies in a grave. One of a man centuries-dead. The other, a girl, recently deceased. Harper's investigation yields another surprise: the next morning, a third body is found-in the very same grave.

What did I think of it:
A great read. I really like the whole idea of Harper being able to sense and communicate with the dead. The mystery storyline in this book is engaging and suspenseful. The romance storyline on the other hand got a bit too angsty for my tastes, but luckily this story leans more to mystery than romance so the angst didn't take away from my reading pleasure. And apart from the angst Harper is a much more likeable lead character than Harris' Sookie from the Southern Vampire series. So I think I will continue to read this series for the mysteries and hope for less angst in future romantic entanglements.

Why should you read it:
It's a well written mystery and don't you just love that cover?

Rombies

Today I got this comic in the mail, send to me by Velvet from vvB32 Reads. As it got zombies I read it straight away and I'll give you a short review of it:

Rombies by Tom Taylor and Skye Ogden

What is it about:
For a gladiator a fight is usually over when his opponent dies.
Today: Not so much!

What did I think of it:
Nicely drawn and full of zombie mayhem! It's a short story, but very entertaining. And it has zombie lions!! What more could you want from a zombie story set in Roman times?! All in all a very satisfying read.

Why should you read it:
It has zombie gladiators and zombie lions!

Born of the Sun - Book Review

Born of the Sun by Gillian Cross

What is it about:
Paula and her father Karel have talked for years about trying to find the lost Inca city of Atahualpa. When Paula's parents suddenly take her out of school and set off for South America, it seems that all her dreams are about to come true.

But soon she finds herself having to answer painful questions. Her father behaves more and more strangely, and he seems obsessed by the idea that sinister enemies are threatening them. Paula starts to realize that loyalty and love for her father are not enough. She must discover for herself what the truth is and what sort of journey she is making.

What did I think of it:
This is an oldie, but it's one of those books I can read again and again. It's got action, adventure, suspense and drama. Paula sees her father a a hero and this view makes the change in his behaviour extra creepy. The jungle they travel through adds to the creepiness, isolating the expedition party even more. The book is well written and the characters are very interesting. I think I've read this book at least 6 times now, but I keep getting drawn into the story every time.

Why should you read it:
It's a compelling Teen/YA adventure

Dracula, My Love - Book Review

Dracula My Love: The Secret Journals of Mina Harker by Syrie James

What is it about:
Many have read and loved Bram Stoker’s Dracula. But questions remain. What is the true story of Dracula’s origin? What if Mina could not bring herself to record the true story of their scandalous affair—until now?

In Dracula, My Love: The Secret Journals of Mina Harker, Syrie James explores these questions and more. A vibrant dramatization, told from Mina’s point of view, brings to life the crucial parts of Stoker’s story while showcasing Mina’s sexual awakening and evolution as a woman, and revealing a secret that could destroy her life. Torn between two men—a loving husband and a dangerous lover—Mina struggles to hang on to the deep love she’s found within her marriage, even as she is inexorably drawn to Dracula himself—the vampire that everyone she knows is determined to destroy.

What did I think of it:
This is how I want my retellings of a classic story to be. James gives her own voice to the story and uses it to weave a new story of her own. She manages to stay true to the original Dracula even while she adds whole new layers and storylines. The story that unfolds is both bittersweet and compelling. I usually am a one on one kind of pig when it comes to romances, but with this story I could easily understand why Mina is torn in two, which is a first for me. Voodoo Bride wants me to add the romance in the book was beautiful and that she cried at certain parts of the story. All in all a wonderful retelling of Dracula. I will sure keep an eye out for other books by James.

Why should you read it:
It's a beautiful retelling of a powerful classic.

Teaser Tuesdays on a Monday - Blood of the Rose

Teaser Tuesdays is a weekly bookish meme, hosted by MizB of Should Be Reading. Anyone can play along! Just do the following:

- Grab your current read
- Open to a random page
- Share two (2) “teaser” sentences from somewhere on that page
BE CAREFUL NOT TO INCLUDE SPOILERS! (make sure that what you share doesn’t give too much away! You don’t want to ruin the book for others!)
- Share the title & author, too, so that other TT participants can add the book to their TBR Lists if they like your teasers!

Just because I felt like teasing today!

Christopher turned and stalked away, straight into the center of the laughing crowd of courtiers. The hint of the scent of fox drifted back to Rosalind, and she wondered which of the male courtiers was a vampire, and whether Christopher had noticed it.
(page 17, Blood of the Rose (The Tudor Vampire Chronicles #2) by Kate Pearce.)

Revelation - Book Review

Revelation (Mass Effect #1) by Drew Karpyshyn

What is it about:
Every advanced society in the galaxy relies on the technology of the Protheans, an ancient species that vanished fifty thousand years ago. After discovering a cache of Prothean technology on Mars in 2148, humanity is spreading to the stars; the newest interstellar species, struggling to carve out its place in the greater galactic community.

On the edge of colonized space, ship commander and Alliance war hero David Anderson investigates the remains of a top secret military research station; smoking ruins littered with bodies and unanswered questions. Who attacked this post and for what purpose? And where is Kahlee Sanders, the young scientist who mysteriously vanished from the base–hours before her colleagues were slaughtered?

Sanders is now the prime suspect, but finding her creates more problems for Anderson than it solves. Partnered with a rogue alien agent he can’t trust and pursued by an assassin he can’t escape, Anderson battles impossible odds on uncharted worlds to uncover a sinister conspiracy . . . one he won’t live to tell about. Or so the enemy thinks

What did I think of it:
A decent story that stays true to the Mass Effect universe as created for the computer game Mass Effect, but otherwise it falls a bit flat. It might give something new to those unfamiliar with the game, but to me it didn't really give me anything I didn't already know or guess. On top of that the writing was a bit static. The characters and their thoughts were merely shown to me instead of making me feel and understand them. Chances of me picking up another novel set in the Mass Effect universe are slim, I think I'll stick to the game which I absolutely love.

Why should you read it:
It's a nice addition to the Mass Effect universe.

Guilty Pleasures - Book Review

Guilty Pleasures (Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter: Book 1) by Laurell K. Hamilton

What is it about:
Anita Blake may be small and young, but vampires call her the Executioner. Anita is a necromancer and vampire hunter in a time when vampires are protected by law--as long as they don't get too nasty. Now someone's killing innocent vampires and Anita agrees--with a bit of vampiric arm-twisting--to help figure out who and why.
Trust is a luxury Anita can't afford when her allies aren't human. The city's most powerful vampire, Nikolaos, is 1,000 years old and looks like a 10-year-old girl. The second most powerful vampire, Jean-Claude, is interested in more than just Anita's professional talents, but the feisty necromancer isn't playing along--yet.

What did I think of it:
Hamilton's writing and world building are solid, her characters interesting and the story is quite good. Still I didn't much care for this book and that has to do with the lead character: Anita Blake.

I really didn't like her! Now why is that you ask?
As far as I could make out from this story and the background info that is given in this book Anita Blake is a bigot. She hates all vampires for something that only a few rotten apples did. At the same time she herself does things in her role as necromancer that had me wincing in sympathy with the ghosts she encounters. I really couldn't live with these character traits and I found myself cheering on the bad guys instead of Anita.
All in all I do not think I will read other books in this series.

Why should you read it:
It's a decent vampire story and maybe you will like Anita better than I do.

In My Mailbox

Look what was in the mail today!
Dracula, My love by Syrie James

I won this book over at ALPHA Reader. If you never visited ALPHA Reader before be sure to check it out. It has great reviews.

Teaser Tuesdays - Revelation

Teaser Tuesdays is a weekly bookish meme, hosted by MizB of Should Be Reading. Anyone can play along! Just do the following:

- Grab your current read
- Open to a random page
- Share two (2) “teaser” sentences from somewhere on that page
BE CAREFUL NOT TO INCLUDE SPOILERS! (make sure that what you share doesn’t give too much away! You don’t want to ruin the book for others!)
- Share the title & author, too, so that other TT participants can add the book to their TBR Lists if they like your teasers!

"I should bust each of you down a full rank for disobeying orders!" He paused to let the statement sink in. "That, or recommend you all for medals."
(page 58, Mass Effect Revelation by Drew Karpyshyn)

Wild Thing - Book Review

Wild Thing by Maggie Shayne, Meljean Brook, Marjorie M. Liu and Alyssa Day

What is it about:
Atlantis, demon hordes, guardian angels, and an animal whisperer. Wild Thing has this and more.

What did I think of it:
As this is an anthology I will tell something about every story.

Animal Magnetism by Maggie Shayne
I really liked this story. It's about an animal doctor who can 'talk' with animals. She's not too fond of humans though, but she might have to change her views when she gets dragged into a series of violent crimes because of her gift.
The action storyline and the romance storyline melt well together and I liked both Macy, the lead character and Jay, her love interest. I might pick up other books by this author.

Paradise by Meljean Brook
I really couldn't get into this story about vampires and guardian angels. I tried to like it as I love Brook's Iron Seas series, but in the end I gave up on this story as it just didn't appeal to me.

Hunter Kiss by Marjorie M. Liu
My absolute favourite story of this anthology!
Maxine Kiss is a demon hunter who get help from a couple of demons that are bound to her in the form of tattoos by day but which are released at night.
Ok: there are now two authors who can write in present tense without me getting annoyed by it! I LOVE this short story. The setting, the characters, the writing: it's all awesome! I'm so going to read the Hunter Kiss series and luckily I already have it in my tbr-pile.

Wild Hearts in Atlantis by Alyssa Day
Voodoo Bride enjoyed this story about an Atlantean warrior and his fated mate, a half breed shapeshifter more than me, but still it's a nice story. I could have done with a little less romance and a bit more action I must confess. There were a couple of storyhooks that weren't used to their full potential and that's always a shame to see.

Why should you read it:
This book is worth reading for the Marjorie M. Liu story alone, but you even get 3 other Paranormal Romance stories as well!

Twenties Girl - A Book Review by Voodoo Bride

Twenties Girl by Sophie Kinsella

What is it about:
Lara Lington has always had an overactive imagination, but suddenly that imagination seems to be in overdrive. Normal professional twenty-something young women don’t get visited by ghosts. Or do they?
When the spirit of Lara’s great-aunt Sadie (a feisty, demanding girl with firm ideas about fashion, love, and the right way to dance) mysteriously appears, she has one last request: Lara must find a missing necklace that had been in Sadie’s possession for more than seventy-five years, and Sadie cannot rest without it. Lara, on the other hand, has a number of ongoing distractions. Her best friend and business partner has run off to Goa, her start-up company is floundering, and she’s just been dumped by the “perfect” man.

Sadie, however, could care less.

What did Voodoo Bride think of it:
I will confess I read the first Shopaholic book by Kinsella and although I liked her writing style, the story itself wasn't for me. So when I saw this book I decided to give Kinsella another chance and I'm very glad I did as I love Twenties Girl!

Lara is a character you can't help loving although she clearly needs to learn to stand up for herself, while Sadie is so spoilt I wanted to kick her at several occasions. As Lara is the only one who can see Sadie, the girls have to learn to work together and both learn a lot in the proces of finding Sadie's necklace. Kinsella's writing style is light, funny and fluffy with a romance added to it that I really enjoyed, which makes this book perfect reading material when you just want to relax and enjoy an easy read.

All in all I think I might pick up other Kinsella books in the future although I will stay away from the Shopaholic series.

Why should you read it:
It's an easy, fluffy romantic read.

"Worth Your Weight in a 'Gator Battle Award"

Just look what a cool award I got!!

Both Gini Koch and Becky from Bibliognome awarded me with the "Worth Your Weight in a 'Gator Battle Award"!

Here is what it is about:

====================================

Congratulations, you’ve won the honor of being Worth Your Weight in a ‘Gator Battle!

The award was created in honor of (at least according to them) the real stars from “Alien Tango”. No, not Katherine “Kitty” Katt or Jeff Martini. Alliflash and Gigantagator, Alligators Extraordinaire!

The “Worth Your Weight in a ‘Gator Battle Award” is only given to the wily, the brave, and the cheeky, so get down with your bad self, you’re deemed worthy to run with the A-C’s!

Now you get to spread the awesome by nominating other bloggers who would also be worth their weight in a ‘gator battle. Battling ‘gators is not for sissies or wimps -- only the strong survive -- so choose wisely!

Your mission details:

0.Slap the graphic on your blog post.
0.Give link props to the person who gave you the award (don’t rile a ‘gator fighter -- it’s dangerous).
0.Spread the awesome and nominate five (5) other bloggers who you think will be worth their weight in a ‘gator battle.
0.Let the recipients know they’ve won this honor on their blogs.
0.Last but not least, shoot Gini Koch an email at gini@ginikoch.com and let her know you’re worthy of running with the A-C’s (put “Worth My Weight” in the subject line!) by sharing that you’ve been nominated and telling her which other bloggers you nominated, and she’ll enter you into the “Worth Your Weight” Contest. Keep reading to find out more details and what the loot is below.

Of course, you can choose to ignore your awesomeness, but then you’ll never have a chance to nab your own A-C or win the loot. And you know you want both.

Contest runs from Wednesday, February 1, 2011 through Monday, February 28, 2011.

*****

Worth Your Weight Contest

International Contest!

Are you worth your weight in a Gator Battle?

Let’s hope you are, because we’ve got a Battle Royale going on right now to see which blogger is the one who can best the ‘gators (and, at least per them, the true stars) from “Alien Tango” -- Alliflash and Gigantagator.

Why do you want to win? Well, we’ll give you not one, not two, but FOUR good reasons!



That’s right. Whoever wins the ‘Gator Battle Royale will win a signed and personalized copy of “Touched by an Alien”, “Love and Rockets”, “Boondocks Fantasy”, AND “Alien Tango.” Yes, really, four books.

But wait, there’s more!

The ‘Gator Battle Royale winner will ALSO receive a signed ARC of “Alien in the Family”. That’s right, it’s really FIVE books!

How can you pass this battle up? That’s right -- you can’t! So…get ready to RUMBLE!

But what about those who fight mightily, but don’t win it all?

Glad you asked! There will be four consolation prizes!

•Consolation Prize 1: Touched by an Alien tote bag and pen
•Consolation Prize 2: Alien Tango tote bag and pen
•Consolation Prize 3: Alien in the Family tote bag and pen
•Consolation Prize 4: Alien Collective tote bag and pen

=============================================

Wow! That is some cool award and contest!
So now for 5 bloggers to bestow this award on!

Enbrethiliel from Shredded Cheddar
Velvet from vvB32 Reads
Laura Bickle from Salamander's Tales
Demented Wench from Demented Wench's blog
Titania from Fishmuffins of Doom

These ladies are all awesome and certainly worth their weight in a Gator Battle!
If you haven't yet, be sure to check out their blogs to see so for yourself!

Interview with the True Heroes of Alien Tango

Those who keep their ear to the ground should know that Alien Tango, the second book in the Katherine (Kitty) Katt series by Gini Koch is all about the gators! But who are these gators exactly and what makes them tick?

Time for me to head over to the swamps and have a talk with the heroes (in my opinion) of Alien Tango: Gigantagator and Alliflash!

G: Thanks, Sullivan. It’s nice that someone knows who really made “Alien Tango” what it is today.
A: Hey, Sully, my pig! The Creator says you’re her favorite pig in the world, so we shouldn’t eat you. Or chase you.

S: Guys, thanks for granting me an interview and even more for not eating me. Let me dive right into my questions:

You had quite the adventure. Can you tell me how it all started?

A: These three guys burst through a wall of the Kennedy Space Center, where we live. A wall! Humans…you really never know what crazy thing they’ll do next.
G: Actually, as I understand it, they were aliens, A-Cs, to be exact.
A: Whatever. So, they run like cheetahs and splash themselves right into our lake. Took weeks to get the taste out of the water. You have any idea what it does to an alligator lake when you toss fresh meat into it, especially when the meat doesn’t get eaten?
G: I’m sure Sullivan doesn’t. It makes us want to feed, only there’s nothing to feed on. Cranky alligators, that’s what it makes.

*Sullivan takes a step away from the water’s edge*

G: Anyway, the smallest one looked around, pointed to me, and shouted, “That one’s huge. You two get to deal with it.”
A: Then the same guy grabbed me in a chokehold and dragged me out of the water and into the building.
G: The other two, who were big and far stronger than I’m used to having to deal with, grabbed me, the bigger one around the neck and the slightly smaller one around the hindquarters. Then I was kidnapped as well and taken into the building.

A certain someone named ACE is taking credit for some of your heroic actions: what are your thoughts on that?

G: Well, I can promise you someone was preventing us from eating.
A: Though I have to admit that when we got tossed into that room with all the people in it, the chaos was pretty fun.
G: You were barely there. You took off after that lone human.
A: She was fast! I almost got her a few times, but those same guys who grabbed us in the lake stopped me.
G: The car chase was fun.
A: Yeah. It was kind of cool to act like we were protecting the people and that ridiculous car of theirs, when really we just wanted all the chow for ourselves. Running that fast that far works up an appetite.
G: I’ll grant you that. I still wake up nights thinking I’m chewing on one of their legs and it turns out to be a log.
A: Good times…good times…


Did your adventures change anything for you? Do the other gators look differently at you now?

A: I have to admit, we’re kind of famous now. There’s a lot of females trying to become our mates. But it’s not ‘cause I’m the fastest or G’s the biggest. It’s ‘cause of our fame.
G: I’ve been top gator for a while now, so I’m used to some of it. But the photographers are the worst.
A: Yeah. They always wait until you have a raw chicken stuck in your teeth and then *bam!* they snap you looking like you’re this mindless eating machine. Sharks we are not.
G: And once you catch them, getting the camera straps off so you don’t swallow them makes for a slow, careful meal. At least, slow as far as we’re concerned.

Gators and Crocodiles get a lot of bad press. Why is that you think?

G: Fear. Plain and simple. It’s not like we ask you to come molest us in our lakes and rivers. You just do. And then you’re shocked when we look at you and go, “Hey, look, dinner’s been delivered.”
A: I’m with G. If you knew us, you’d love us. We’re cool, and we’ve been around the planet a long, long time.

S: I can relate to that, pigs have similar problems. A cousin of mine complains about humans disturbing him and his family when they’re looking for some nice acorns in the woods as well. He’s mostly a vegetarian, but when you got the tusks and a strange human tries to cuddle your kid, what’s a boar to do?

G. With you there, my friend. They steal our babies and then act surprised when we do our best to make sure they’ll never do it again? Humans. Can’t live with ‘em, can’t eat ‘em all. Trust me, I’ve tried.
A: And the less said about alligator skin anything, unless it’s on the actual ‘gator, the better.
G: And the only pigskin that should be in use is a football.
A: Gator high five! ‘Nuff said.

A famous reptilian is the crocodile that’s after Captain Hook. What is your opinion: Crazed man-eater or misunderstood hero?

A: Hero all the way! Captain Hook’s a lunatic madman.
G: A megalomaniac if I ever saw one. You’d think everyone would wise up to why Tick-Tock is trying to eat him and rid the world of yet another evil mastermind. Tock’s just trying to help the pixies and kids. And yet there he is, treated like he’s a villain.
A: He gets all the girls, though. You think we’re seeing action because of “Alien Tango”? We can’t touch T’s game. Dude just has to mention that he’d like a little company and the females go into a frenzy.


Talking about heroes: who are your personal heroes?

A: You mean besides Tock? G’s my hero, man. G’s the GATOR!
G: I’m blushing. I have to say, Al shows the others how it’s done. Supposedly a gator can only go fast over a short distance. My buddy here? He can keep it up for miles. No one’s got his speed. If things were fair, he’d be in the Olympics.
A: Other than G and Tock, I’d have to admit that I’ve got a soft spot for Drew Breeze. And Kurt Warner.
G: John Madden. All the way. Man’s worthy of being a gator.
A: Joe Montana, Joe Namath.
G: Vince Lombardi.
A: Excuse us…have to have a moment of silence.
G: Okay, go on Sully.

Ok, time to debunk or confirm some gator myths:

I’ve been told gators only have 4 different facial expressions. Is this true and if it is: how do you tell how another gator is feeling?

G: We only have 4 different expressions humans can spot. We have myriad for other gators. We know what we’re feeling and thinking.
A: Usually what any gator’s thinking at any given time is: I’m hungry; it’s nice and warm; how about a swim; wanna do the deed; why aren’t they running the ball; why aren’t they passing the ball; why is the ref blind; and look, stupid human alert. That’s your basics there. Of course, we can get into deeper thought and discussion than that.
G: We’re big on philosophy. Why are we here, why are humans so stupid that they think we’re logs, if I stashed food and cannot find it does that mean I never had the food to begin with…questions like that.
A: And why did the Saints lose to the Seahawks? THE SEAHAWKS?
G: Let it go, Al. There’s always next year.
A: The Falcons lost, too.
G: Really. Let it go. Sully doesn’t want to see you cry.

As we're talking about crying anyway: Alligator tears? What’s the word on that?

A: The usual human lies. We can cry. But usually only the female alligators do that. G and I only shed the manly gator tears when it’s something really tragic, like both the Saints and the Falcons not making it to the Super Bowl.
G: Well, I don’t think it diminishes a gator to admit he has a softer side. On the other hand, I’ve shed my share of fake ones. But sometimes you have to pull out all the stops to get the female. And, I have to admit, the Saints and the Falcons both not making it, combined with the Buccaneers not even having a shot…it was pretty wet in the swamplands, if you get my drift.


And now for some last personal questions:
Alliflash: Any chance you’ll be taking up long distance running or some other endurance sport?

A: We discussed it, but I don’t like the way, if you excel, someone’s always insinuating you’re juicing. I had some ‘gators who suggested I was on steroids to be able to chase that girl all over the Space Center. Not true, but things like that are hurtful, and I’m pretty happy as is, so, barring a really great endorsement deal, probably not turning it into more than something to do to pass the time.

Unless the Saints, Falcons or Bucs need me. Then I’m there, dude, I AM THERE!

Gigantagator: You pack quite a punch. Will we be seeing you in major league gator wrestling?

G: As I understand it, the UFC is looking to expand to Gator Class, and, if so, I’m assured that I’ll be in the octagon. I’ve asked to go against Brock Lesner and Frank Mir. Put together. Because I know I can take them.

And, of course, I’m with Al -- if my teams need me to suit up, I’m there for them. But I’m only interested in MMA or football. I mean, it’d be ridiculous to have a gator playing basketball. Gators got game, but we really can’t jump.

S: Well, that wraps it up. Thanks for your time and once again for not eating me. I hope this interview will help in giving you and the other gators some positive press as you sure deserve it.

G: Thanks, Sullivan. You’re a pig in a million.
A: That’s right, dude. You da PIG, Sully! DA PIG!

S: Gigantagator, I wish you good luck if you do head into UFC territory.

G: Team Gator. Remember the name.

S: Alliflash, don’t worry too much about the girl that got away, I’m sure there will be another that you do manage to catch.

A: There’s always another stupid human around to fall into the swamp, Sully, you’re right. Me, I’m just ready to manage G and Team Gator and let the logs fall where they may!

Haven't read Touched by an Alien and Alien Tango yet?
Better get to it, as both books are amazing and book three Alien in the Family will be released in April!